We got a cat a few days ago and I’m not sure how I feel about it. I’m happy but there’s something missing, a spark or connection. The cat is cute. It’s a mixture of my last two cats, Synchro and Triforce. Synchro was gray and Triforce had these lovely stripes.

Honestly, I’m not ready for another cat yet but I want my kids to be happy. When Link would see a cat, he would point at it and said he wanted one. The cat is very lovely and affectionate but I was hoping it would keep to itself. I do pet it and hold it but it doesn’t feel the same as when I would hold Triforce and Synchro. I sorta zone out whenever I hold the cat.

I keep calling it cat because I can’t come up with a name that fits for it. They named it Winter at the shelter but I’m not feeling it. I was either thinking of Ahsoka or Snips which I do think fit but an inner part of me doesn’t want to name it that because deep down, I feel it doesn’t deserve that name. I’m being such a bitch to a lovely cat.

I want to get another cat so they can keep themselves company and kinda not bother me. Don’t get me wrong, I love cats. I’m 100% a cat person but I wasn’t ready to replace Triforce. If I was selfish and not considered my kids feelings, I wouldn’t have gotten another feline until it felt right. It was almost a 7 year gap between Synchro and Triforce and when Triforce suddenly appeared in ours lives, I wasn’t even sure if enough time has passed. But there was a connection there and my love for Triforce was instant. I can’t say the same with this new cat.

It’s a little painful sometimes.

Can I possibly grow to love this new cat? I think so but it’s going to take time.